The BIG day hs finally arrived...........

I awoke to find Ben standing at the side of my bed,

‘Mummy I’m excited ~ I have met the surgeon his assistant, I’ve met other children who have had the operation & they are all fine ~ So I’m ok, I’ll just be asleep, you can do all the worrying!

And off he went!  I turned to Damian and said ‘Wow’

So we got up and showered packed hospital bags made sure we all had everything and at 8:30am we set off to the hospital, as we approached the lift I looked at Ben and his bottom lip was shaking so I began to cry – a quick cuddle in the lift and we were all back on track.

The short walk was just what we all needed, Ben was chatting and jolly as always.  As we approached the hospital I started to feel sick – Ben mentioned that he has butterflies in his tummy.

Once inside it was off up to the 6^th Floor – Same Day Surgery.  As we checked in Charlie & Tina arrived, it was great to see them.  Then we went to the waiting area until we were called.  Stephanie Ben’s nurse came and called us in, first height & weighing then off to his pre-op room.

 Finally Hug!!!

As we settled in Tyler arrived a Children Life Specialist he talked Ben through all that was going to happen and showed his pictures of what he would see he answered any question Ben had and that was that.  Next time to get the fishing PJ’s on,  Jacob became very quiet and just sat on the chair and watched were as Ben was chatting and even laughing and joking with us.  Julia came in next she was a assistant anaesthesiologist who talk us through what would happen and asked Ben what flavour he would like in his mask – as they didn’t have chocolate he chose apple, so both he and woofy got to try out the masks.  She also suggested a medicine to make him a little drowsy and enable him to relax.  This was given at 11:05am as soon as he had it he asked to go to the toilet so Damian had to carry him as he was a little wobbly as the medicine. By 11:25am his was zonked!! That’s when the rest of the anaesthetic team arrived for finally checks, all was good so it was a tearful goodbye from all of us and Ben was taken to theatre. 

That was it my baby had gone, I feel sick, scared and anxious – Jacob came and gave me a huge hug and we settled down to the waiting game....

As the private family room was not free yet we stayed in the main area – Damian & Jacob when off to get some lunch and I just sat and stared into space.  I was a really strange feeling, we (as a family) had made this decision for Ben to have the operation yet I felt so guilty that we were putting him through this.  Dr Park is the world’s best & I know he is in safe hands I still felt guilt.

Not long after we moved into the family room & hooked up the laptop – I still find it hard to believe that you are allowed to us laptops and mobiles in the hospital.  Straight onto Skype to talk to the ‘Parents’ emotional it was.  Then sit back and wait – the first phone call came about 1hour after he had gone to say he was fine and they were just about to start.  Jacob asked to go and play in the sibling playroom so Damian took him down.  After about 20 minutes they came back he decided not to...  The second phone came to say all was going well and they were about to start the second part.  Time went by quite fast or seemed to as Jacob was a good distraction for us. 

Then before we knew it Dr Park walked in – He was pleased all had gone well and he was being moved to recovery.  The relief was amazing but I just wanted to see him, we were told it could be up to an hour before we could see him – more waiting.  That was the hardest time knowing he was out but not able to see him.  After an hour Damian asked at the desk and they said we could go through – but Jacob had to stay behind, he tried to be brave but I could see tears in his eyes...

As we walked down the corridor my heart was in my mouth – I could see him, lying there, pale, hooked up to so many things monitors, lights flashing noises all around.  But my boy was ok, he opened his eyes briefly we kissed him then he was off to PICU – but it was full so he ended up on CICU just across the hall, he was in a little bit of pain but said he was ok, I burst into tear he was here.  The nurse told us she had spoken to him and he had told her he was always sweaty which made us laugh.   Jacob got to see him just as he was about to go in.  They again took him in and we had to wait about 45 minutes in the Family Lounge, Jacob went straight for the vending machine!!!

Soon Michael, Ben’s nurse came and told us we could see him, he was a still very drowsy but managed a little smile then when to sleep. 

The night was hard – Damian took Jacob back to the apartment so I was left on night duty.  I was a little anxious to say the least but Michael talk me through whatever he was doing which put me at easy a little bit anyway. With all the changing of drips, medicines and hourly response test sleep did not really happen.  Ben would go for about an hour then stir as to be rolled and sometimes was sick, but was so brave; he even got cross with me on several occasions and as me to leave Michael to do it!! That’s my boy.....

Well all in all we got through it Ben is just so amazing and strong – we just watch and wait now, tomorrow the 12^th Floor.

Charlotte xx